Thursday, April 4, 2013

San Francisco, California


So I moved to San Francisco about 5 months ago... and it is called San Francisco.  No one calls it "frisco" unless you're.. "one of those".

Why did I move to San Francisco though?  I'm not necessarily obsessed with living in tundra like whether, I loved having my car and my very own studio apartment before coming here and I'm not a hippie or extreme liberal what so ever, and I have no family here.  I've never really wanted to live in the city, actually.  I do love baseball but thats besides the point.  My best friend moved here for college when we graduated high school, actually about 15 of my friends did it seems like, but I never had the urge or want to live here.  I've always been in love with New York City.. but as a 24 year old here I am.  Living in the Mission with three faith based, composting, earth loving, bike riding individuals and my room is now 4 by 8.  However, it's a beautiful city.  I've always known this having grown up 50 or so minutes away I'm just having a hard time really enjoying the city since my living situation is shit.

But there's this guy...  and this guy is my boyfriend.  Lets just call him Guy.

Minus me being able to conveniently transfer over to the city with my current job and having a sturdy circle of friends already based here.. point blank, I moved to San Francisco for Guy.  I'm perfectly okay with saying that.  For once, I moved for a guy.

I love him.  No really, I LOVE HIM.  I love his family.  I love what he aspires to do with his life.  I love the amazing sex we have.  But a part of me, though I was opposed to it in the beginning, feels like he should want to get a place with me.  Granted, I've never lived with a man before.. I MOVED.. to SAN FRANCISCO and our one year anniversary is coming up.  I mean, maybe that's too soon.. I don't know I've never done this.  But I don't think it's wrong for me to want Guy to want to live with me.  I'm awesome, really funny, beautiful, and I regularly give him blowjobs which I enjoy doing.. because I love him.

We fight.. I don't know if we fight a lot, but we fight often.  Sometimes they're big most of the time they're small but every time they wear me down.

For the first time in my life I really have no idea what I'm doing.